28 May 2009


The weekend was pretty mellow around here. No major plans, just putzing around the house and a quick trip over the border for a day at the zoo with SIL. iPastor worked Saturday overnight, so we cleared out of the house to let him sleep in peace. We came home, and I let the kids monkey pile in the living room and watch movies. iPastor woke at about 4am and wandered down to discover they had left the outer porch door open. He went to close it, and spooked a cat, who ran into the now-closed door, not once but twice, before escaping to the basement. He was perturbed enough to come wake me.
"We may have a problem. Fuzznut is acting really strange. I wonder if she's not hurt or sick..."
She has been known to squirrel off and go live down by the river for a couple weeks at a time, and as much as I try to keep her inside, she loves to go out and tussle with other cats and come home a little banged up.
He described the cat mayhem in enough detail to completely screw up my sleep for the remainder of the night. We all kept watch for Fuzz. On a couple occasions, I'd hear the cats in the hallway growling at each other, a bit unusual but not unheard of in this house. I'd go investigate to check on Fuzznut's mental state, just to see the tip of a tail disappear into the basement and a grey body slink under the stairs. The next afternoon, however, Fuzznut sauntered up and demanded her spot on my lap, all love and sunshine. Apparently, whatever was bugging her had passed. Later that evening, I heard the cats having a showdown in the hallway again, and witnessed the same aforementioned ditch and slink. The next time I saw Fuzznut she was all love and cuddles again, a bit perturbing. This morning, I wandered into the creepy old basement laundry room, not bothering with lights. I saw Fuzz on the laundry table, but she bolted when I came close. By now her bipolar behavior was becoming worrisome. After school, the Things noticed the other two cats gathered with interest on the basement steps, heard the vocalization of feline disagreement, and also noticed the distinct odor of a male cat...in our house full of spayed females. A little grey face peeked out from under the oil barrel, very familiar, but just a little bit...off. Then Thing 3 reported that Fuzznut had just come in from outside. Our Jeckyll/Hyde cat mystery was now solved, but we had another problem: a feral cat darting from nook to cranny to junkpile in our basement. We shifted piles of lumber and household junk, and general hilarity ensued.

We discovered that a fish net is strong enough to hold a struggling cat, but a frightened cat is agile enough to escape from the top. Eventually we subdued the cat with sheer numbers: Three Things, my Looziana daughter and myself. We calmed the raging tempest, and released the poor wretch to the wild.

The Imposter:


That's about enough excitement for this week.


Ed said...

Now that is funny!

Cliff said...

My wife, (a veterinary tech grad, and my brother a vet) both claim the only thing important while restraining a cat is that everyone must let go at the same time.