Holy cow. I had to snake out the basement drain again. I accomplished that successfully, but when I was rewinding the snake, I pinched the heck out of the underside of my arm in the spring-loaded feeder.
Now for a bit of a flashback. One day at Job 1 I was visiting with a regular customer, when I bobbled a dish I was carrying, but made an impressive save. When she commented on it, I remarked that I had dropped many dishes over the course of my 23 years hauling food, but I had never dropped anyone's order before they got it. Not two weeks later, I flipped an order of nachos with an impressive spin that rivaled the coin toss at the superbowl. We fast forward back to tonight, when Murphy must have decided I was due to make up for lost time. As I came into the dining room at job 2 with two plates, my right shoe caught the loop of my left shoelace. I had on some real speed, and as I felt the solid tug of my dignity being yanked dead in its tracks, one thought had time to flit through my brain before I hit the ground: this cannot be happening. I did a rather impressive belly flop. I was carrying mexican, which is huge and double plated on heavy duty platters. The ridge under the plates landed solidly on my inner knuckles, sandwiching one firmly in bruises and slicing the other open. The other side of that platter fell across my other forearm and left a bruise under a minor burn. I have rugburn on my elbows, and every time I turn around I notice a new battle scar. My back is already stiff and I must have jarred my jaw to give myself a lovely headache. I will be so sore in the morning. My almost-40-year-old body is not meant to carpet dive. For all the comments I suffered about being so generously endowed that if I ever fell forward I would bounce back up, I was sadly let down. I hauled myself up and made sure no customers were in the blast radius, then hobbled off to bandage my finger and my pride. I guess I should look on the bright side. The sympathy tip bounced up to 25% for a while and at least I wasn't carrying cast-iron fajita skillets.