22 January 2007

A Monday morning funny

My inbox this morning contained the following anecdote of uncredited origin. It came via my wickedly witty friend Ann who needs to post on her blog more frequently for my enjoyment.

****

I was in Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina for my dog Lola and was in line to checkout.

A woman behind me asked if I had a dog........Duh!

I was feeling a bit crabby so on impulse, I told her no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I had awakened in an intensive care unit with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms.

Her eyes about bugged out of her head.

I went on and on with the bogus diet story and she was totally buying it.

I told her that it was an easy, inexpensive diet and that the way it works is to load your pockets or purse with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry.

The package said the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.
I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a tall guy behind her.

Horrified, she asked if something in the dog food had poisoned me and was that why I ended up in the hospital.

I said no ..... I'd been sitting in the street licking my butt when a car hit me.

I thought the tall guy was going to have to be carried out the door.

****

With that, I return to the everyday ramble. Have a good one.

5 comments:

katjjames said...

So how does that go if you wanted to start the "Meow Mix" diet, death by hairball?

Gette said...

In the imortal words of Bill the Cat,
"Ack! Pfffft."

Robin said...

Oh my goodness - that is the funniest story I have heard in a long time LOL!!!
That was hysterical!!!

Cliff Morrow said...

And to think I spent 2 minutes of my youth on that. :) good one gette

Candy Minx said...

Very cute! I liked that one.

Hey thanks for stopping by my blog last week for Thursday Thirteen.

You said my link took you back to a September post oops sometimes I am not paying attention.

Great to "meet" you.../


and if you are interested in art come check out my crazy rambling post for todays TT list...

Cheers
Candy

http://gnosticminx.blogspot.com/2007/01/desperate-and-lonely-time.html